The Importance of Feeling Feelings

For the beginning intuitive and spiritual seeker, coming into relationship with the emotional body is essential for physical, emotional, and psychic health, for accuracy of our intuitive guidance, and for improving our relationships.  So many of us have the belief that negative emotions serve no useful purpose, or are an indication that we are doing something wrong.  We may end up frustrated with ourselves for our feelings of anger, grief, or hatred, and we may try to cover up our discomfort with depression or unending activity.   When we know that emotions are information and energy, we can approach our emotional bodies with less fear and judgment.  Then it becomes a task of exploration and self discovery to jump into our emotions, even the uncomfortable ones.

Our health, both physical and emotional, is dependent on free flowing feelings.  Unresolved feelings do not disappear with time.  Instead, they become blocked within our physical and emotional bodies, sometimes even creating disease.  So many people believe that time heals all wounds and so they let time pass in the hope that they (or their loved ones) will feel differently.  I have found this not to be true.  Old hurts, angers, and resentments do not fade without being dealt with directly or through personal growth work.  The surest way to move a feeling out of our bodies is to be willing to experience it in the moment.  Because past unresolved hurts are still in the present, we can heal a past hurt by feeling it now.  (Some emotional traumas need assistance from a healer or therapist to be moved out of the body effectively.  See Illuminations for one method of moving trauma out of the energybody.) 

For Intuitives, if our emotional bodies are cluttered or hidden from us, our intuitive hits will end up distorted, or we will confuse our own unresolved emotions for an intuitive hit.  Also, because we are empathic, we are very sensitive to emotional energy.  Knowing our emotional bodies intimately prevents us from taking on and absorbing the emotional energy of those around us; we are able to claim what is ours and refuse what is someone else’s.  When we are clear about our emotional responses, our intuitive guidance is able to use those feelings as channels.  Many times during my own readings, if I experience emotions that I know are not mine, I can interpret them as clues to what my client needs to hear next.

Emotional energy, when understood, gives us information about how our innerselves are reacting to the outerworld.  We need our emotional responses to live effective lives.  People who do not pay attention to their emotions miss important cues to how their relationships are unfolding.   They may also find themselves projecting their unwanted emotions on to others.  The more out of touch we are from our feelings, the more our feelings and emotions run our lives unconsciously.   When we are fully aware of our emotions, we are at choice whether to follow them or not.  The most emotionally dissociated people think they are run by logical thought process, but if observed for long enough, it is apparent that the fear of facing their emotional body is the main motivating factor in their lives.  (For more explanation, see the essay, Emotional Dissociation.)

It’s in our best interest to explore underneath our emotional responses because the more we try to hide any aspect of ourselves from ourselves, the more that aspect will push forward to be restored to consciousness.  The way the shadow side of ourselves pushes forward is usually very unpleasant and can create unsavory situations in our lives and in the lives of our loved ones.  We do everyone a favor when we become willing to dive into ourselves.  This takes tremendous courage and faith in ourselves and our basic goodness.  When we uncover our shadow side we realize that we hold the whole spectrum of emotions, and that those emotions hold positive gifts for us.  Some examples are: anger can help us hold our boundaries and strengthen our personal power, and sadness and grief can help us have compassion for others.

Embracing our emotional responses by being willing to feel all our feelings and think all the thoughts generated by those feelings is the key to self awareness and emotional well being.  As we do so we develop the experiential knowledge that our identity is not based on our feelings or on our thoughts; those feelings and thoughts are transitory.  Being willing to face our feelings enables us to face and understand others’ emotional needs as well.  In fact, it is only to the extent that we know our emotional bodies that we can experience intimacy with others, or be a healing presence for others.  We also discover that emotions are simply energy moving through our body, and we stop judging the feelings we have in the moment.

Being emotionally mature and competent means being willing to experience our emotions and being willing to face another’s emotions without a need to change or dismiss emotional signals for our own immediate comfort.  When we are truly willing to do so, we open ourselves up to the deep richness of life that cannot be experienced in any other way.


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